So often we may hear the phrase, ‘Look Within’ as all the answers are there, but it’s not often explained to us what it really means, or how we can do this. By learning to listen to ourselves we begin to tune into ourselves, what we want to do, what is best for us and how we really feel about things. Looking within helps with decision making; it helps us to get to know ourselves and who we really are and what we really want from our lives. By looking within we quietly find the answers at our own pace.
By looking within, and acting upon those answers, we begin to learn to trust ourselves and cultivate a more stable sense of self-confidence which is built on firmer foundations than the borrowed confidence of others, where we depend on another person for their answers, not ours. When we start to find our own answers we begin to tread a path towards self-awareness, empowerment and growth and a richer, more fulfilling expansive life. We are less likely to seek the answers of others. We find that our path unfolds beautifully in support of our growth, that we truly do begin to see that we do hold within, our own answers.
No one can ever really know as much as we do ourselves, about ourselves, with all of our individual life experiences 24/7 that make up who we really are, thus far. There are many thoughts and feelings that we keep to ourselves, until we feel adequately secure to open up completely – if we can ever do that anyway. How can we reasonably expect that anyone can truly deliver to us an answer that takes into account the whole of us, and the entirety of our own situation? Only we know that and this realisation can be empowering in itself. We ourselves are the only one that can live our own life. Others have not done this for us so far in an entirety, and they cannot do this for us in the future either. They have their own hopes, dreams and expectations which quite often will colour, and distort, how they might see us and our situations and what they think might be best for us.
Asking a question of another, no matter how knowledgeable, how experienced, how many qualifications they have, or how psychic they may seem to be, can be disempowering. Sometimes we may hand over our own personal power or trust to another, thinking that they have our answers only to find with disappointment that perhaps they weren’t right and what we had been thinking ourselves, was right in the first place. Our foundations, if built upon another’s foundations, can rapidly crumble.
words and pictures copyright Emma Sims 2009 ©
How to Look Within – Tuning in to your Self
It is a good idea to begin doing this exercise when you are in a positive frame of mind, as any negativity that you are feeling can cause interference. You may want to begin by asking a small question, one where you will not have anything to lose by getting it right or wrong.
Sitting quietly, make sure that you are comfortable and relaxed; you may want to meditate. You will literally be talking to yourself but you don’t have to do so out loud. Ask yourself a closed question, one that will prompt either a yes or no response, such as ‘is it right for me to take this job?’ If you’re looking for a small question, try asking one such as ‘Is my name X?’ Pause and listen inside your head for the answer, just as you would wait to listen to someone that you have verbally asked a question of.
This pause helps to create a gap in the thoughts of our logical, rational minds by putting them briefly on hold. We do this quite naturally when we ask another person a question as we wait for them to reply, we ‘stop’ to listen to them but we may not stop to listen to ourselves if we’re not used to it.
You should hear your answer in the still, small voice, and one that sounds like your own head voice. It will sound calm, and relaxed and will never ask you do to anything that would harm or hurt yourself, or another, with malicious intent. This calm voice is sometimes referred to as your Higher Self or your intuition – which is literally your own personal guide or Inner Tuition. If you hear a voice different to your own, and you feel comfortable with it, it could be that you are linking up to what some believe to be a Spirit Guide or Higher Power. Any voices that you may hear that are malicious or make you feel uncomfortable, seek professional help for.
You may then ask yourself, how do I feel about the answer that I heard? Notice in your body how you feel about it - do you feel it in your heart, in your stomach as your gut instinct, in your head, or elsewhere? Do you feel positive about the answer? Does the answer sound and feel calm? Does your body feel ‘open’ to it, or does it shrink and feel closed and tight? Does it sit right with you? Are you comfortable with it? If you feel completely comfortable with it, then it is the right answer for you at this time. Remember that things change and the answer that once was, is not always necessarily going to be the right answer for you further down the road.
When you feel ready to, (note when you feel ready - are you ready? Yes or No?) you may want to ask your still small voice more open questions such as ‘what would be the wisest thing for me to do about this or that situation?’ Pause and listen for the response.
If I am unsure about something I also ask for a sign that will give me some direction - the occurrence of synchronicity can be very reassuring that we are on track.
Sometimes the answers don’t come immediately, especially so if we hear yes and no together. It may be that we are being called to cultivate a little patience, ride things out and wait for things to unfold and in due course the answers will come. As the saying says, ‘when in doubt don’t’. The art of ‘right timing’ can often be a factor and it might not be the right time to go – we don’t always arrive at the crossroads to find that we can go straight through the green light, sometimes we have to wait on the red one for a while.
When the answer doesn’t seem to be the right one !
Firstly ask yourself why? Listen for your answer.
Secondly, we don’t always get it right, no one does! Sometimes our fears can get in the way of our intuition, which is why we may think we’re following our intuition when something really exciting happens and it turns out that we have made a mistake. When we have asked a question and heard yes or no, it can help to check in with our heart to see whether it feels open or closed (expansive or shut) as this can give us a measure of whether we are able to remain open to something, without feeling fear. Does our heart feel comfortable about this answer?
Our expectations can override our intuition. When we really, really want something, we can overly focus and attach to it, instead of listening to the still small voice which tends to remain rather detached and doesn’t get as involved and dragged into the drama and excitement of situations; our intuition doesn’t tend to ‘overreact’. If we can let go of the outcome and trust that we always ‘get what we need’, or trust in the Divine Plan or in fate, we may be able to hear the intuition still. When we get scared of making the wrong decision and go into fear, it can again cause us to overly focus on the outcome. This can often lead us to perceive that if we get it wrong, we have made a mistake. By viewing ‘mistakes’ as opportunities for learning and growth, i.e. we can learn from them, and by taking responsibility for our own errors, we allow ourselves to grow as a person. We then may also be less hard on ourselves, when we think we’ve got it wrong and instead cultivate a degree of acceptance for ‘going with the flow’ and accepting what just is.
Emma Sims © 2006
This article is part of the
Follow Your Intuition
Workshop
